Friday, December 5, 2008

Registered sex offender looking for work. (babysitting preferred)

Last night I was listening to the John and Jeff show while driving home from a friend's house. The topic was a news story about a Minnesota couple who hired a 23-year-old man off of Craigslist to babysit their kid.

Yes, you read that correctly. They hired a complete stranger from a shady website to spend six hours alone with their offspring. In their defense, at least he wasn't really, really, extremely creepy-looking.


Oh wait.

According to myfoxtwincities.com, after these mouth-breathers left for the evening, the man proceeded to "...coerce the child under his care to engage in sexually explicit conduct while videotaping it." Which means he probably showed up to the job looking something like this:


"Do you guys have a basement?"

This waste of space could be facing up to thirty years in prison, and I'm sure we all hope he gets the maximum sentence and then some. But lets talk about the parents for a second.

What event could possibly have been important enough to these people to warrant leaving their child with a complete stranger? And if you have to go online to find a sitter, why pick Craigslist? That site is for finding used washing machines and adobe-themed furniture. Not childcare.

This kind of irresponsibility should be rewarded with at least a few years of community service. Or maybe you could give them a test consisting of one multiple choice question. Get it wrong and the punishment is life in prison.

The question could be: "If a train leaves St. Louis at 3:35 a.m. and travels west for seven hours, then which of the following babysitters is most likely to shatter your child's innocence?"

And the choices (click to enlarge):

A.

B.

C.

Any parent dumb enough to leave their child with a creep from the Internet deserves life in prison. Which I hear consists mainly of getting raped, crying, and crying while getting raped.

2 comments:

Lindsey Capel said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rusty said...

Yup, he's a creepy pedie and he probably likes to dress up in a diaper.